Being human is difficult.
If things are only between you and God, then everything's good, everything's fine.
But now there's other people and they are of all different shapes, sizes and attitudes. You now have to thread carefully.
The problem I have is with peer pressure.
I hate it.
But usually I try to be nice to those who induce it upon me. They are my friends after all.
Thing is, it's hard to say "no" at times, sometimes, most of the time and for some, all the time. You have your own beliefs and intentions but you don't want to disappoint others. So, how?
"If your friends are true friends, they will understand." Bloody cliche. I didn't say that it's wrong or what, but sometimes, even the best of friends won't understand, I think.
One of the 9 fruits of the Holy Spirit is gentleness.
Not weakness, not brute strength, but strength under control. You have your convictions and they have theirs. Difference is, you do not get influenced or overwhelmed by their views, yet you still respect what they have to say.
Pretty difficult to achieve, huh? In times like this where pride, power and pressure overflow the world.
That's why gentleness is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. It's something supernatural. We can't do it by our own sheer willpower.
=====
I don't know whether you have experienced this.
You say, "yes" and something tells you that you're one who tries to satisfy all - you have no mind of your own. You say, "no" and something tells you you're being nasty and not respecting your friends.
Not sure whether that 'something' is just me or what. By the way, I tend to think too much. I have a split personality - I don't know why. I can hate and like someone at the same time. I can have two extreme, opposite views on something.
I think have said enough...
Friday, March 31, 2006
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Urban Resonance
Embracing the street life.
Something greyscale for now. This piece was conceived purely by the grace of God. I was sourcing for images and photos to manipulate and had some difficulty in doing so.
Played around with the images I found to be suitable but stumbled here and there - designer's block, that is.
I felt like halting this project and doing something more constructive, but I stubbornly played around with different styles. What a rough design journey.
And...here it is.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
Thursday, March 23, 2006
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
The Noise in the House
Second creation. Just trying out some new and used-before styles and the combination of them.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
I forgive the egg-thrower
Moments ago while I was doing my quiet time, someone from the ground floor through an egg into my room (2nd floor).
I was noting down a bible verse and then, "piak". A shattered egg on my floor, just below my cupboard. The broken shell was here and there and the affected area was flooded with egg white and yolk.
=====
Earlier on in the day I read that God uses circumstances to develop our character. He places unlovely people around us to cultivate love in us. He places us in chaos and disorder to seek true peace from Him.
And He puts troublemakers around me to mature in me patience and tolerance.
People who sin and trespass on you with malicious intent.
=====
I flipped His Word and this verse came out:
13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Col 3
Praise the Lord!
Dear God:
I was noting down a bible verse and then, "piak". A shattered egg on my floor, just below my cupboard. The broken shell was here and there and the affected area was flooded with egg white and yolk.
=====
Earlier on in the day I read that God uses circumstances to develop our character. He places unlovely people around us to cultivate love in us. He places us in chaos and disorder to seek true peace from Him.
And He puts troublemakers around me to mature in me patience and tolerance.
People who sin and trespass on you with malicious intent.
=====
I flipped His Word and this verse came out:
13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. Col 3
Praise the Lord!
Dear God:
- You have once again upped my patience
- You were there to help me forgive others
- because of You, I didn't curse that person
- thank You, for providing me with this circumstance.
- you are forgiven
- please do not waste food
- may God impress in you the value of food and provision
- don't do this to others (the consequences may be worse)
Monday, March 20, 2006
Very sian!
I'm very tired now. Since Sunday, I guess. Been moody as well. I think it's my time of the month.
Going to rest early and meeting some of my friends for dim sum buffet in the morning. Honestly, I'm not 100% enthusiastic about it. But, oh well...
Got too much things in my head lately as well. Thinking too much also. Worrying at times.
God, I need You! I am weak, but You are strong. Praise the Lord.
Going to rest early and meeting some of my friends for dim sum buffet in the morning. Honestly, I'm not 100% enthusiastic about it. But, oh well...
Got too much things in my head lately as well. Thinking too much also. Worrying at times.
God, I need You! I am weak, but You are strong. Praise the Lord.
just for fun
There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country. "Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk. "Only the Ten Commandments." Answered the lady.
========
Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."
========
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. "Lead us not into temptation."
========
There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
========
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked. "You know -Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
========
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."
========
A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?" The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy." The young boy replied excitedly, "It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'"
========
Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the Pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
========
Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."
========
A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter. Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. "Lead us not into temptation."
========
There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."
========
A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?" A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy. "Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked. "You know -Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "
========
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."
========
A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!" His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?" The son replied, "I do know!" "Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?" "That's easy, Daddy." The young boy replied excitedly, "It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'"
========
Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about. The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the Pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about. He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."
Saturday, March 18, 2006
Paint Splat
Here's the result of playing around with Photoshop. Vector art. Simplicity and minimalism.
Friday, March 17, 2006
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
5th March 2006. The day I officially started doing my quiet time.
I did it before, but that was like 3 or 4 years back. Then I lost my fire for God. Came 5th March when I decided to make an effort to study His Word, I have never looked back ever since.
There's some much to learn, there's so much to apply. As a Christian, I should NOT only attend church and cell and keep receiving knowledge and blessings from Him. Not saying that that's bad, but I should take a step further to give what I have received from Him to benefit others as well.
He does not bless me to make me feel good. He blesses me to make me and blessing, bless those around me and make Him feel good.
Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
It's sad that some of us keep demanding more from Him when He has already given us so much. Count our blessings, please. And use them for His glory.
The quiet moments I spent studying His word were really fruitful. He speaks to my heart in ways which I never experienced before. Now I know, He has His answers in the Word and He's just waiting to point me to the relevant ones (for the moment). That's how He speaks to me. And almost all cases what I studied applies to what I'm going through.
Better is one day in Your courts
Than thousands elsewhere
I must say that these couple of days spent in intimacy with Him cannot be compared to the rest of my days playing around with my spiritual life. I didn't take Him seriously last time, that's why I wasn't as close to Him as compared to now.
I long to be with Him only. But somehow, the world will try all means to pull me away...
I did it before, but that was like 3 or 4 years back. Then I lost my fire for God. Came 5th March when I decided to make an effort to study His Word, I have never looked back ever since.
There's some much to learn, there's so much to apply. As a Christian, I should NOT only attend church and cell and keep receiving knowledge and blessings from Him. Not saying that that's bad, but I should take a step further to give what I have received from Him to benefit others as well.
He does not bless me to make me feel good. He blesses me to make me and blessing, bless those around me and make Him feel good.
Every blessing You pour out I'll turn back to praise
It's sad that some of us keep demanding more from Him when He has already given us so much. Count our blessings, please. And use them for His glory.
The quiet moments I spent studying His word were really fruitful. He speaks to my heart in ways which I never experienced before. Now I know, He has His answers in the Word and He's just waiting to point me to the relevant ones (for the moment). That's how He speaks to me. And almost all cases what I studied applies to what I'm going through.
Better is one day in Your courts
Than thousands elsewhere
I must say that these couple of days spent in intimacy with Him cannot be compared to the rest of my days playing around with my spiritual life. I didn't take Him seriously last time, that's why I wasn't as close to Him as compared to now.
I long to be with Him only. But somehow, the world will try all means to pull me away...
Sunday, March 12, 2006
just for fun: an explanation of life
Before I head back to camp, here's something I found in my inbox.
=====
On the first day God created the dog.
God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten." So God agreed.
On the second day God created the monkey.
God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span."
The monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And God agreed.
On the third day God created the cow.
God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man.
God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."
So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
=====
On the first day God created the dog.
God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will give you a life span of twenty years."
The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and I'll give you back the other ten." So God agreed.
On the second day God created the monkey.
God said, "Entertain people, do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span."
The monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And God agreed.
On the third day God created the cow.
God said, "You must go to the field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."
The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And God agreed again.
On the fourth day God created man.
God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years."
Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty, and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?"
"Okay," said God, "You've got a deal."
So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and bark at everyone.
Life has now been explained to you.
Saturday, March 11, 2006
Surrender
I Stand In Awe
You are beautiful beyond description
Too marvelous for words
Too wonderful of comprehension
Like nothing ever seen or heard
Who can grasp you infinite wisdom
Who can fathom the depth of your love
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty enthroned above
And I stand, I stand in awe of you
I stand, I stand in awe of you
Holy God to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of you.
Two things happened during service today:
1. I went to the front during worship
2. I cried to the Lord
I decided to take worship seriously. I didn't just went through the motion like I did countless times before. I also got real with God - face to face.
It's just Him and me. No one else. The people around me didn't matter. I made it a point to not just sing songs because the tune's nice but to sing them because I meant it. Because it came from my heart.
They projected the lyrics on a giant screen. Two purposes. [1] So that you will know how to sing the song and [2] you will know what you're actually singing. That explains the not going through the motion part.
As the songs progressed, I paid close attention to what I was singing - from the individual words to phrases of the song.
Many phrases were things like:
I got real with God and He got real with me. I felt so vulnerable.
There I was thinking that I'm great, I'm good, I'm sufficient, I'm better than many other people. And then I thought again. Those things didn't honour Him in any way.
I then cried to Him. I suddenly felt so small, so insignificant as I stood before Him.
And that song "I Stand in Awe" struck my heart. Who am I compared to Him? And I don't deserve to stand in awe. I should go on my knees.
Yet, I'm also reassured that he forgives and will always welcome you back into His embrace. How wonderful.
I'm glad God respected my seriousness. If you want to draw near to Him, get right and get serious. You won't regret it.
You are beautiful beyond description
Too marvelous for words
Too wonderful of comprehension
Like nothing ever seen or heard
Who can grasp you infinite wisdom
Who can fathom the depth of your love
You are beautiful beyond description
Majesty enthroned above
And I stand, I stand in awe of you
I stand, I stand in awe of you
Holy God to whom all praise is due
I stand in awe of you.
Two things happened during service today:
1. I went to the front during worship
2. I cried to the Lord
I decided to take worship seriously. I didn't just went through the motion like I did countless times before. I also got real with God - face to face.
It's just Him and me. No one else. The people around me didn't matter. I made it a point to not just sing songs because the tune's nice but to sing them because I meant it. Because it came from my heart.
They projected the lyrics on a giant screen. Two purposes. [1] So that you will know how to sing the song and [2] you will know what you're actually singing. That explains the not going through the motion part.
As the songs progressed, I paid close attention to what I was singing - from the individual words to phrases of the song.
Many phrases were things like:
- to praise You
- to magnify Your name
- to give thanks to You
- to bring You honour
I got real with God and He got real with me. I felt so vulnerable.
There I was thinking that I'm great, I'm good, I'm sufficient, I'm better than many other people. And then I thought again. Those things didn't honour Him in any way.
I then cried to Him. I suddenly felt so small, so insignificant as I stood before Him.
And that song "I Stand in Awe" struck my heart. Who am I compared to Him? And I don't deserve to stand in awe. I should go on my knees.
Yet, I'm also reassured that he forgives and will always welcome you back into His embrace. How wonderful.
I'm glad God respected my seriousness. If you want to draw near to Him, get right and get serious. You won't regret it.
Transformed by Trouble
- God uses circumstances to develop our character
- He uses them more than us reading the Bible, to make us more Christlike
- life is a series of problems
- problems are normal
- "Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trail you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you." 1 Peter 4:12
- God uses problems to draw you closer to Him
- "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
- problems force us to look to God and depend on Him instead of ourselves
- problems are just incidents in God's plan for you
- "We know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. For God knew his people in advance, and he chose them to become like his Son." Romans 8:28-29
- much of what happens on Earth is evil and bad, but God specialises in bringing good out of it
- everything God allows to happen to us is for His purpose for us - to be more Christlike
- "Not only so, but we also rejoice in our suffering, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope." Romans 5:3-4
- circumstances are temporary, but character lasts forever
- since God wants to make us like Jesus, God will take us through the same experiences Jesus went through
- "Now if we are children, then we are heirs - heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory." Romans 8:17
1. remember that God's plan is good
- For I know the plans I have for you, " declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jer 29:11
- the secret of endurance is to remember that your pain is temporary but your reward will be eternal
- thank Him that He will use your problems to fulfil his purposes
- "...because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:3-4
- if you are facing trouble, don't ask, "Why me?". Instead, ask, "What do you want me to learn?"
Friday, March 10, 2006
If he doesn't care, should I?
I'm supposed to meet an old friend of mine at Plaza Singapura at 1pm. But I messaged him that I could only come at 3.
It all started a few days back. We chatted on msn and decided we should catch up with each other, since it's been a long time. He sounded so enthusiastic to meet me. Well, if he's showing interest, then on my part, I ought to respond to that interest by making an effort to take some time off to meet him.
Fair enough.
I messaged him the meeting time and place just yesterday. No reply. I then called him yesterday. No answer. I called him twice earlier this morning. No answer. I messaged him the new meeting time. No reply.
Sometimes I just wonder if my God-given kindness is being taken for granted. That I'm always the one trying to please people. That I should change my ways to suit their ways. That I'm the one putting in the effort which some others suck dry.
Maybe, I'm thinking too much - like I always do. The problem with my mind. Sometimes I take things too seriously.
Perhaps his mobile phone died.
But he could still make it a point to call me, to msn me, to email me, to acknowledge that he received my message or just to follow-up on discussing where to meet. If only he could do his part, then.....
I think I should stop.
It all started a few days back. We chatted on msn and decided we should catch up with each other, since it's been a long time. He sounded so enthusiastic to meet me. Well, if he's showing interest, then on my part, I ought to respond to that interest by making an effort to take some time off to meet him.
Fair enough.
I messaged him the meeting time and place just yesterday. No reply. I then called him yesterday. No answer. I called him twice earlier this morning. No answer. I messaged him the new meeting time. No reply.
Sometimes I just wonder if my God-given kindness is being taken for granted. That I'm always the one trying to please people. That I should change my ways to suit their ways. That I'm the one putting in the effort which some others suck dry.
Maybe, I'm thinking too much - like I always do. The problem with my mind. Sometimes I take things too seriously.
Perhaps his mobile phone died.
But he could still make it a point to call me, to msn me, to email me, to acknowledge that he received my message or just to follow-up on discussing where to meet. If only he could do his part, then.....
I think I should stop.
Never delay goodwill
Proverbs 3
27 Do not withhold good from those who deserve it; when it is in your power to act.
28 Do not say to your neighbor, "Come back later; I'll give it tomorrow" - when you now have it with you.
Its amazing how God can speak to you in his many wonderful and mysterious ways. You read His Word and suddenly a verse or two jumps out and rings a bell.
"How relevant and applicable, to my current context." You whisper.
The essence of these two verses simply states that you should never delay goodwill. Do what you can do today. Why wait for tomorrow to come?
Many times I play the waiting game. I think I still have time. I procrastinate. I wait for tomorrow and when tomorrow comes, I wait again.
Somehow, reality gives me a tight slap. I recover and before I retaliate, I realise that tomorrow may not come. We just assume it does. We are taking God's grace for granted. How foolish of me.
Even the secular world says, "Live your days as if each was your last."
How true. And now the Bible confirms it.
27 Do not withhold good from those who deserve it; when it is in your power to act.
28 Do not say to your neighbor, "Come back later; I'll give it tomorrow" - when you now have it with you.
Its amazing how God can speak to you in his many wonderful and mysterious ways. You read His Word and suddenly a verse or two jumps out and rings a bell.
"How relevant and applicable, to my current context." You whisper.
The essence of these two verses simply states that you should never delay goodwill. Do what you can do today. Why wait for tomorrow to come?
Many times I play the waiting game. I think I still have time. I procrastinate. I wait for tomorrow and when tomorrow comes, I wait again.
Somehow, reality gives me a tight slap. I recover and before I retaliate, I realise that tomorrow may not come. We just assume it does. We are taking God's grace for granted. How foolish of me.
Even the secular world says, "Live your days as if each was your last."
How true. And now the Bible confirms it.
Distorted Army Propaganda
Some images I found which makes fun of the Armed Forces. At the same time, they also reflect the realities which servicemen like us see - invisible to the public's eye.
I think I'm gonna get sniped once I step out of my door.
Faith of the Space Marine
If you don't know, this unit's from Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War, a real time strategy PC game.This fella is the grunt. Its fighting capabilities are decent. Its sturdy and will fight till the last drop of blood. Other than attributes and properties which make this class a formidable fighting force, what inspires me is their faith.
Their faith to their emperor, that is.
If you use them during the game, here's some of their lines:
"Ever vigilant!"
"For the Emperor!"
"Stay Vigilant, brothers."
"Onward, to glory!"
"Fear our wrath."
"None shall stop us!"
"For the glory of the Imperium."
"We are the Emperor's chosen."
Their fighting spirit is impressive. They fear no enemy, for their deaths bring glory to their king. Their discipline is of the highest standards - that they rather be "crippled in the body, than corrupt in the mind".
Although its only a game, I sometimes wish I had their kind of motivation. And their faith.
If they are so willing to die for their emperor (who's probably made of flesh), why am I not willing to die for God (who's omnipotent and eternal)?
[Seriously digressing and daydreaming] If one day I have to put on some kind of armour, pick up my rifle and fight God's enemy, what would it be like? I'm not talking about man's enemy (like infantry, tanks or planes), but God's enemy - demons, imps, hellhounds, and the devil himself.
Imagine on the frontlines taking aim from your weapon. The ground trembles and cracks. Crimson beams of light pierce your retinae. Demons are unleashed. They are more than ready to consume human flesh. And torment the spirit inside. Their frenetic bodies charge towards the human garrison.
Placing all man-ly hatred and differences aside, humans have to unite for the last time. Its now or never. People panic. They suddenly realised that all earthly possessions are temporary and that life with Him is eternal. Without that, they all go down. They all go to where those demons came from. And they will be there for a long, long time.
Once those desecrated beasts come within range, my commander gave us the orders to open fire. "Not my will, but Your's be done." I murmured, before I squeezed the trigger. Steaming empty cartridges fell onto the ground, just as some beasts did. But behind the fallen ones, more of their comrades charged toward us. They were getting closer, yet our ranged weapons couldn't hold them off.
Those which came close pounced and ripped apart our fellow infantrymen. There was blood and guts everywhere. Their fangs and claws defeated human armour like a hot knife through butter.
I was getting more and more anxious. I tried to make my shots count. More men were wasted. The commander was getting stressed. His face told us that we would meet our end very soon.
Before the hellhound pins your down and gives you the kiss of death, are you ready to meet your end?
Thursday, March 09, 2006
I'm not that effective after all
Just when I thought that God has made me mature, I found out that there's more to be done.
Yes. God did shape up and harden my character through suffering and hardship. I did become more patient, more tolerant and more understanding. I put my utmost in whatever I do. Fine. But the story doesn't end here.
I look around me and there's a lot more to be done. Friendships and relationships to be touched by reconcilation. People around me to influence in a positive and encouraging manner.
Reason being, it all starts with me. I'm not stating that I'm weak or what, but I'm merely being real.
Take for example: a person who doesn't take his work seriously.
What we usually do is we stand from the sidelines and start blaming the person. We reveal his mistakes and expose his vulnerability. We rebuke and curse him.
"Its definitely his fault."
"Its always him."
"Ahh...he's just brought up that way. That's why."
Wake up, shall we? Stop blaming if you don't plan to rectify the situation. It doesn't help improve anything when you just stand there and shell those remarks of yours.
Ask yourself, "Have I done anything to help him?" and "What can I do to help him?"
If you aren't useful or if you think you can't help (according to your abilities), then move aside.
Be proactive and seek to understand his feelings. Understand what he is going through. Once you are able to see things from his perspective, then maybe he's not that bad afterall.
If we did make the effort and things don't improve the way we want them to, don't feel bad. This isn't failure. God has the solution, nevertheless. But at least, you have done your part. And once you do your best, God will take care of the rest.
But how about those people who don't even deserve our attention, but are still getting in our way?
I don't know lah....I'm only human.
Yes. God did shape up and harden my character through suffering and hardship. I did become more patient, more tolerant and more understanding. I put my utmost in whatever I do. Fine. But the story doesn't end here.
I look around me and there's a lot more to be done. Friendships and relationships to be touched by reconcilation. People around me to influence in a positive and encouraging manner.
Reason being, it all starts with me. I'm not stating that I'm weak or what, but I'm merely being real.
Take for example: a person who doesn't take his work seriously.
What we usually do is we stand from the sidelines and start blaming the person. We reveal his mistakes and expose his vulnerability. We rebuke and curse him.
"Its definitely his fault."
"Its always him."
"Ahh...he's just brought up that way. That's why."
Wake up, shall we? Stop blaming if you don't plan to rectify the situation. It doesn't help improve anything when you just stand there and shell those remarks of yours.
Ask yourself, "Have I done anything to help him?" and "What can I do to help him?"
If you aren't useful or if you think you can't help (according to your abilities), then move aside.
Be proactive and seek to understand his feelings. Understand what he is going through. Once you are able to see things from his perspective, then maybe he's not that bad afterall.
If we did make the effort and things don't improve the way we want them to, don't feel bad. This isn't failure. God has the solution, nevertheless. But at least, you have done your part. And once you do your best, God will take care of the rest.
But how about those people who don't even deserve our attention, but are still getting in our way?
I don't know lah....I'm only human.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Fatigue and Disappointment
Fatigue. Its a packed week in camp, for our platoon especially. We have parade rehearsals and that stupid chemical exercise. Feels like I'm losing my breathing space as the days go by.
The Armed Forces came up with a safety guideline which was to ensure that participants to any activity (not matter how tiring or sadistic) should have at least 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Many times, this guideline has been broken, if not severly bent. But for this week of ours, we do satisfy that safety regulation.
Problem is, we don't have much of a life. Time's usually spent waiting for orders to be passed down to us, waiting for things to happen, travelling from camp to home and back again (and its really far for people like me). Time's being spent rather unconstructively. And you thought that the Armed Forces was effective and efficient.
Disappointment. Hard and harsh times bring out the true colours in all of us. Myself included. I may have lost my temper, thrown my frustrations all around, cursed others directly and indirectly, etc. But thank God, I'm more patient and tolerant now.
Point is, people around me start to show signs of bad attitude, poor discipline and lack of motivation - to say the least. They begin to take things for granted and do things for the sake of doing them. That's one thing I really hate.
They got the entire purpose wrong and their attitudes are not right. Some throw their seniority around and expect leniency.
Worst of all, some feign illnesses (which they don't have in the first place). Sick bastards. They pre-plan a few days before. And when the hectic days arrive, they strike. They visit their neighbourhood polyclinics, make up some story telling the doctor they're not well and walk out with an MC.
Even worse still, they seem so proud of it. Dammit! This is the part I hate most! They go around boasting that on so-and-so day, they won't be around. Some go further to say that even though they are absent physically, their spirits will be with us.
Yup. They are simply numb about how the rest are feeling. They don't know what we are going through.
Nevertheless, I still respect those who endure and press on despite the circumstances.
Oh...how I long for the weekends...
The Armed Forces came up with a safety guideline which was to ensure that participants to any activity (not matter how tiring or sadistic) should have at least 7 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Many times, this guideline has been broken, if not severly bent. But for this week of ours, we do satisfy that safety regulation.
Problem is, we don't have much of a life. Time's usually spent waiting for orders to be passed down to us, waiting for things to happen, travelling from camp to home and back again (and its really far for people like me). Time's being spent rather unconstructively. And you thought that the Armed Forces was effective and efficient.
Disappointment. Hard and harsh times bring out the true colours in all of us. Myself included. I may have lost my temper, thrown my frustrations all around, cursed others directly and indirectly, etc. But thank God, I'm more patient and tolerant now.
Point is, people around me start to show signs of bad attitude, poor discipline and lack of motivation - to say the least. They begin to take things for granted and do things for the sake of doing them. That's one thing I really hate.
They got the entire purpose wrong and their attitudes are not right. Some throw their seniority around and expect leniency.
Worst of all, some feign illnesses (which they don't have in the first place). Sick bastards. They pre-plan a few days before. And when the hectic days arrive, they strike. They visit their neighbourhood polyclinics, make up some story telling the doctor they're not well and walk out with an MC.
Even worse still, they seem so proud of it. Dammit! This is the part I hate most! They go around boasting that on so-and-so day, they won't be around. Some go further to say that even though they are absent physically, their spirits will be with us.
Yup. They are simply numb about how the rest are feeling. They don't know what we are going through.
Nevertheless, I still respect those who endure and press on despite the circumstances.
Oh...how I long for the weekends...
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
We don't suffer for nothing
How true. He doesn't let us suffer in vain.
1 Peter 4
12 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.
13 But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
14 If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you.
16 However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name.
19 So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.
Some pointers:
Nevertheless, the world will still make our lives difficult somehow. The degree of suffering depends on the people around you, the state of governance in your nation, etc.
Various degrees of suffering:
It doesn't end yet. Despite all suffering, we are still to be faithful and do good. That explains why this life on Earth prepares us for eternity. It's the full-dressed rehearsal to get us ready for the actual show - the real one. The hardships in this world will harden and mature your character and you shall bring that character into eternity - not fame, fortune, education, material possessions, etc.
1 Peter 4
12 Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.
13 But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.
14 If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you.
16 However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name.
19 So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good.
Some pointers:
- do not be suprised if you're undergoing hardship or suffering
- rejoice that we suffer what Christ has suffered
- those who suffer for Him are blessed
- those who suffer for Him should continue to be faithful and do good
Nevertheless, the world will still make our lives difficult somehow. The degree of suffering depends on the people around you, the state of governance in your nation, etc.
Various degrees of suffering:
- humiliation
- criticism
- persecution
- execution/martyrdom
It doesn't end yet. Despite all suffering, we are still to be faithful and do good. That explains why this life on Earth prepares us for eternity. It's the full-dressed rehearsal to get us ready for the actual show - the real one. The hardships in this world will harden and mature your character and you shall bring that character into eternity - not fame, fortune, education, material possessions, etc.
Happy to be Using my Voice, if possible
Yesterday, after our drill training when the RSMs (Regimental Sergeant Majors) debriefed us, they asked the entire contingent whether we had anything to highlight or bring to their attention.
I rose my hand and stood up. I told them that our guys will be having a MOPP 4 (Mission Oriented Protective Posture level 4) training tomorrow. In layman terms, MOPP 4 is basically our chemical suits - for use in a CW (Chemical Warfare) environment. Rubber gloves, gas mask, boot covers, protective coveralls, etc. Anyway, this training was for an exercise which we are going to have around 2 weeks later in base.
Point is, there's this MOPP 4 training on Tuesday and on Wednesday, drill rehearsals resume. Concern? We fear we may not have sufficient rest.
What happened later doesn't really matter to me. What I'm glad for is that I spoke up. I stood up for my fellow platoon-mates. I made a decision of not suffering in silence. I made a proactive choice. I have a voice and I'm happy I used it.
Thing is, many of us in the Army have chosen not to speak up (myself included, in some circumstances). We have our own reasons. Many, think that things can be better. Some, think that its possible to take action to make things better. Few, take that action.
I understand. Regarding those who refuse to voice up, I know how they feel. They fear that after offering their suggestion, things may get worse. Superiors may come up with a more adverse consequence to your action. Then, your friends will think that you're trying to "act smart" once again. However, if things do really turn out for the better, your friends happily accept the positive change and forget that you're really the one who triggered the change.
Typical Conversation
Officer: How's training today?
Men: (F*cked up, man!) Outstanding, Sir!
Officer: So, are you guys very tired?
Men: (Of course! Can't you read faces?).........No, Sir..
Officer: Hey, are you all sure?
Guy who speaks up: Erm...actually, training was a little too tough for some of us, Sir.
Reply 1 (ideal/desired consequence).
Sir: Hmm...in that case, I shall implement more breaks in between intervals for your speedier recovery. If you all put in your 150% effort and all goes through well, the next training day will be an off day for everyone.
Reply 2 (realistic/most common consequence).
Sir: Icic. In that case, you all will book in a few hours earlier to rest, since you guys say you're tired. Fair enough?
Therefore, in the Armed Forces, its best to watch your tongue. Sensible stuff doesn't mean the right stuff - to those without common sense, that is.
I rose my hand and stood up. I told them that our guys will be having a MOPP 4 (Mission Oriented Protective Posture level 4) training tomorrow. In layman terms, MOPP 4 is basically our chemical suits - for use in a CW (Chemical Warfare) environment. Rubber gloves, gas mask, boot covers, protective coveralls, etc. Anyway, this training was for an exercise which we are going to have around 2 weeks later in base.
Point is, there's this MOPP 4 training on Tuesday and on Wednesday, drill rehearsals resume. Concern? We fear we may not have sufficient rest.
What happened later doesn't really matter to me. What I'm glad for is that I spoke up. I stood up for my fellow platoon-mates. I made a decision of not suffering in silence. I made a proactive choice. I have a voice and I'm happy I used it.
Thing is, many of us in the Army have chosen not to speak up (myself included, in some circumstances). We have our own reasons. Many, think that things can be better. Some, think that its possible to take action to make things better. Few, take that action.
I understand. Regarding those who refuse to voice up, I know how they feel. They fear that after offering their suggestion, things may get worse. Superiors may come up with a more adverse consequence to your action. Then, your friends will think that you're trying to "act smart" once again. However, if things do really turn out for the better, your friends happily accept the positive change and forget that you're really the one who triggered the change.
Typical Conversation
Officer: How's training today?
Men: (F*cked up, man!) Outstanding, Sir!
Officer: So, are you guys very tired?
Men: (Of course! Can't you read faces?).....
Officer: Hey, are you all sure?
Guy who speaks up: Erm...actually, training was a little too tough for some of us, Sir.
Reply 1 (ideal/desired consequence).
Sir: Hmm...in that case, I shall implement more breaks in between intervals for your speedier recovery. If you all put in your 150% effort and all goes through well, the next training day will be an off day for everyone.
Reply 2 (realistic/most common consequence).
Sir: Icic. In that case, you all will book in a few hours earlier to rest, since you guys say you're tired. Fair enough?
Therefore, in the Armed Forces, its best to watch your tongue. Sensible stuff doesn't mean the right stuff - to those without common sense, that is.
Sunday, March 05, 2006
Initiation and what to expect
Its time to get back blogging. The last time I effectively blogged to a recognised audience was some years back. That time I didn't really know what I was doing or talking about. Updates were sporadic, entries were immature - sometimes filled with vulgarities.
Well, I was younger then, and not very sensible.
Let's get serious. Bloggers have a responsibility. Your users (audience) are people with emotion, reason and feelings. We can't just blog what we like to. Topic-wise, yes. But there are some things we have to keep in mind.
Well, I was younger then, and not very sensible.
Let's get serious. Bloggers have a responsibility. Your users (audience) are people with emotion, reason and feelings. We can't just blog what we like to. Topic-wise, yes. But there are some things we have to keep in mind.
- Users can misinterpret our thoughts, possibly resulting in unthinkable consequences.
- Users appreciate maturity of thought. Don't just tell them what you did in the day or how you friend offended you. Go deeper. Analyse the situation. Was it really your fault? What do you plan to do next? Ignorance or reconciliation?
- Users want to learn something. Something that matters to them. Provide constructive discussions and debate about the issues which you are addressing.
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