Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Okay, it's our 1-week recess period now. I know, but I'm very stressed.

There's so much things I wanna do (which I couldn't during the normal school days) and there are so much things I ought to do (notice the difference). And add on the usual obligations, duties and roles to perform, etc.

Yes, I'm rather stressed. Even though we're only in the 2nd day of this 1-week break, I can feel the immense pressure on my head and chest right now. The urge to get things done.

You might say, I'm crazy and I'm being too hard on myself, but honestly, I feel worse when the deadline's over and objectives are not achieved as expected. That would make me feel worse.

So that's why I'm pushing myself onwards to diligence and proactivity in the things I do. Doing it all for God's glory.

Hahaha...it's like saying "No" to complacency and procrastination. Yeah, those two are my most stubborn enemies. Whenever I think I'm over them, they suddenly appear beneath my skin.

Hmm...time to get back to my Effective Communication assignment...

God bless!

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

He put in me a new song

Somehow or rather, this CNY period, with all the late nights, binge snacking and excessive feasting, my body's not feeling very good. And there's the persistent holiday mode still inside of me.

But one awesome thing happened during this short holiday period!

The Lord inspired me to write a song for Him.

Was in the shower when I was humming some random melody until a distinct tune came up. Then I used it alongside some lyrics (which I crafted on the spot) and it sounded alright! After the shower, I went to my desk, got out my journal and penned down the prototype lyrics. Took my guitar and tried to give the melody a more definite chord progression.

And pooh! It fit in well. So I stayed up until 2am plus coming up with the chorus (with God beside me and His infinite wisdom and creativity) and then the lyrics for the verse. Sounded well too. It's a praise song with an upbeat tempo.

Isn't our God so wonderful?

Alrighty, in the days to come I'll formulate a more concrete structure to the song, perhaps a chord progression for the introduction as well. And also to come up with a second verse or maybe even a third.

I'll share it with you folks when I'm done.

God bless!

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Sorry if this sounds cheesy.

Studying (memorizing facts, formulae, concepts, knowledge and all) is like building up your city's walls.

Getting exposure (doing tutorials, past year exam papers, etc) is like training and equipping the troops on the ramparts.

The enemy is slowly marching towards you. At every moment, their army is a step closer to your walls.

If you don't study, you may have troops (without walls) but their line of defense will melt when the enemy charges and pierces through with brute force.

If you don't practice, you may have sturdy walls, but with few guards on it, the walls and defenses will soon fall into the hands of the enemy's siege weaponry.

So, you must study and practice as well.

Dear Lord,

In the things that I do, I ask of You for David's passion, Solomon's wisdom, Daniel's discipline and Nehemiah's diligence.

That whatever I do will count towards bringing You glory.

In Jesus' name,


Monday, February 05, 2007

Unwell, uneasy, uncomfortable

Been feeling the combination of these 3 for the past few days and even now.

Superficially, it's could be due to my busy schedule for last week, coupled with school work and the lack of sleep and all that. But there could be spiritual reasons to it as well.

Ever since the Crusaders began their 13-day period of praying and fasting to seek God's face, I must say that my walk with Him has been much closer than before. But I'm not going to stop there.

I want more of Him. Less of me and more of Him. Even...none of me and all of Him.

Last week I was leading worship on 2 consecutive evenings. Thursday was Crusade's crossroads (some sort of a mini-service with worship and message) and Friday was for cell.

Honestly speaking (for such a perfectionist like me), I went up with high expectations for myself (and for my team, for the Thur worship stint). I made sure the flow was right, that we had somewhat sufficient preparation and set the chord progressions straight. All the nitty-gritty stuff.

Then we did worship.

And I was stunned when I looked at the body languages of the worshippers. I was somewhat disappointed. "Hmm...how come they're so stiff?" "Or is it just me?"

I thought I did something wrong or did not do something right for the time being. Then, I decided to let God take charge. Absolute charge.

Bluntly and frankly speaking, I went on with the worship proceedings without thinking about anything except God. Seriously, I don't care if other people dragged their feet into His courts or if they didn't like the songs being sung. I don't care. I only care about whether I'm able to connect with God or not.

It's not (or NEVER) about me, nor them, nor the person beside you or me, nor the competency of playing an instrument, nor the song, it's about Him.

Which leads me to the point where I felt uncomfortable spiritually because I was approaching Him with things still obstructing my view of Him.

Foolishness are the things which hinder you from worshipping Him wholeheartedly.

I feel sick when something, or someone, or some situation or some experience or some etc, etc prevents me from seeking His face.

I appreciate reality checks. Why? Not only is it because we live in reality (hope you know this by now) but because God is real.

Yes. He has poured out His infinite love and unfailing grace to you and me. But that does not imply that we can have reason to be reluctant when coming to Him. When we drag our feets and go about our daily lives only seeking Him for a matter of convenience.

He's the Name above all names. Repent and ask Him for forgiveness if you EVER use His name in vain.

We ought to revere God with our everything.

I'm sorry if certain things I say here hurt or damage your feelings, but this is necessary. He is the most high and I have to defend Him for His sake not out of the sense of duty, but because I love Him.

God bless.