I'm not a workaholic

Please....don't think that my life is all about studies. And all I do is study, mug, and do my tutorials. Don't think that I'm always on the look out to accomplish more. And don't think that I essentially have no life.

In fact, the reason why I'm trying to work so hard (and sometimes place myself in 'overdrive' mode) is so that I have time for other people/things. Because the more work I get done now, I will have more spare time for my other commitments and I can proceed with them without the nagging feeling that I'll have to disengage from them soon to get back to my unfinished business.

I'm currently pushing myself harder during the weekdays so that I have time for church, family, friends and some personal recreational time during the weekdays. I'm not doing this because I'm addicted to my work. No!

There's already a lot to be done.

Sometimes when I'm close to the point of 'death', as in burnout, I feel like throwing in the towel. But I know I'm not doing what I'm doing in vain. In a way, it's the business in life which makes it interesting. Imagine if you have nothing to do, no commitments, no hobbies, nothing to look out for and too much time in your hands...I think that kind of life is a wasted life.

And for those of you folks who think that I'm "missing out a lot" when I stopped playing computer games, think again. What do all these give/benefit you besides the temporal stress relief?

Not to say that I haven't played them before, but in fact, I played away a few years of my life with them. And now, I say that that's the wasted life.

Pick up something more constructive. Computer games isn't morally wrong or detrimental to society, but is that the best avenue for you to channel your time into?

Picking up a skill would be great way to improve yourself and unwind your stress at the same time. Learn a musical instrument, learn a new computer software, learn a new sport, learn how to cook, learn how to fix hardware, learn some soft-skills (time management, effective leadership, interpersonal communication, etc).

Make the best use of your time, because life is short.

And whoever thinks that Christians have no life, PLEASE.... We have the most life, in fact. Eternal life - life in Jesus Christ.

God bless.

I'll wait on You, Lord

There are certain aspects of my life which are exceptionally crucial to me. Some private ones and some public ones (like studies, family, church, work, etc).

As for those which are critical and can affect the days of my life to come to great extends, I shall seek and inquire the Lord of them. No answer, nevermind...Continue waiting.

I shall stop being a smart-Alex in the decisions I make. Instead to going ahead with them and only stopping when God says "No", I'll wait until God says "Yes"...then I'll proceed.

If He doesn't respond, I'll wait and will continue waiting because I know that He will answer and speak to you if you seek Him with all you've got.

There are certain desires in me which I would dearly like them to be granted/fulfilled. But looking at whatever I been through with the Lord, I decided to place them below Him in terms of importance and priority. Those things I may not have, but Him, I surely have.

Certain desires in me drive me to the point whereby the moment God takes away any part of it from me, I'll feel somewhat despaired and empty. That doesn't look right at all. Because the Lord gives and takes away, I will bless Him for the times He takes things away from me, so that I'm just left with Him.

...Till the point when that particular desire is nothing compared to Him. And if it's meant for you and according to His will, nothing can stop Him for granting you that desire.

If it's His way, He will make a way. If it's not His way, He will close all ways even though in your eyes the path is apparent.

Speak to me, Lord...that's all I desire. I'm sick and tired of being so preoccupied with serving You that I'm not even that close to You. I don't want to be obsessed with doing things for You that I neglect the relationship between the both of us - intimacy.

I want to hear Your voice, O Lord. I want to be so close to You, like how close the prophets were to You. Even though You're omnipresent, I'm desperate for Your manifest presence.

Let's meet up more often God...